awake

I feel so awake today...
Being in an office with one another instead of two has been so peaceful.
The office manager finally gave in to my repeated requests (aka nagging) for desk lamp and uplighter in our office that he gave permission for a pilfer raid, so everytime anyone saw me in corridors today I have been hiding behind lamps and poles (so to speak) - we now have ambient lighting in our peaceful office.

I only saw three offenders today - but each of them ended up in tears - not because of my technique ( at least I think not!) simply the circumstances of their lives. It's strange, cos it's so much more draining than if it were friends, I suppose because with friends it very straight forward, I love them, I want to help them and will do whatever it takes. With offenders there are boundaries and not supposed to care, and sometimes you dislike them, sometimes you like them and it all gets so complicated. And I'm not a counsellor, so have to guard against using counselling. I have to be empathic, but guarded, with an eye on risk and public protection at all times.. it's wierd. Plus, I was brought up in a family with clearly delineated lines of right and wrong, always on the side of the law etc, respect policemen blah de blah.. yet It still feels wrong to 'grass' - even when I make referrals to Children's services where I suspect neglect or inability to care I still have a twinge of 'guilt'. How strange.

My video hates me and recorded the Hits channel instead of Neighbours today.... grrrr. I have threatened it with biscuits. It better behave tomorrow.

I dreamt that Spike licked me!!