working on it

I've got to go back to work tomorrow. Which is depressing and distressing in equal measures. I am trying to not think about it, which isn't the best of ploys. I shall be going to bed imminently not sure whether that's a preparatory or an avoidance technique.

But! I've had a week off and it has been good and I have been busy -I have sewn (although not finished anything yet, as I got distracted), I have painted my bathroom, I have eaten out almost every day. I have seen friends and I have taken Mother shopping, I have seen friends, I have read fic, I have revamped my garden. (My garden is tiny, and "revamping" was really only removing a winter's worth of cat poo, stripping the bark away, replacing it with compost, weeding, pruning and planting out 72 Lobelia (I bought trays of plants, they were on offer, 3 for 2, I never looked at how many were in the trays, and now I have 72 Lobelia) I also have 3 periwinkle in pots. All of that took just long enough for me to have aching limbs and one shoulder and half my back burnt to buggery, whilst the rest remains resolutely lily white.) I lost track of my brackets there.

I also cleared out my clothes - wardrobes and chest of drawers, after opening a drawer I rarely use and finding a stack full of clothes I didn't remember owning. It sounds as if I have oodles of gear, but I'm just a rut dresser, wearing the same 7/8 outfits on a cycle. So, today I tried on, rejected unworn clobber (and found some stuff that I didn't know I liked - it's almost like shopping!

And I've been watching season 1 H50 and remembering when it was all good and every episode didn't make me cross.

The highlight for me has been the last two days though, I put my foot down (with myself as much as anyone else) and vowed that I wasn't going to leave the house. I can't remember the last time I did that (I can, it was before we lost Dad), since then I've been to Mum everyday, or on the days I haven't, it's been because I've been somewhere else and couldn't make it. These past two days are I think the first where I've just been here, doing what I want, with no time table. I haven't been idle, it's these two days that have seen me gardening and wardrobe sorting, but I've done it at my own pace. I haven't even gotten dressed today (or I've gotten dressed a hundred times, if you count trying on all my clothes!) and it's just been mellow. (Even if I've eaten cream crackers for all three meals, because I have no other food in the house!)

Anyway.

Work tomorrow. Bed now.

We have snow, but not as much as they keep telling us we're going to have. Which, I don't even like snow, but I can't help but feel cheated.

Work has been weird - Monday started by going in and finding out that one of the receptionists had been sacked abruptly late Friday, which was unsettling. It's sad that all the expressions of sympathy were empathic in nature, frather than genuinely upset that the particular person had gone. Sad too that the reactions went from "Gosh, really why?" to "who's covering her work?" very quickly. She was an odd and not overly pleasant person though, so I guess that's been reflected.

Anyway, after that, Tuesday there were men on the roof making ridiculous amounts of noise. Removing some form of structure, which resulted in Wednesday, walking into an office with caved in ceilings, debris and muck and much water everywhere. (Thankfully not my office space). Much dispute has arisen between contractors and management as to the extent and cause of damage. (contractors are positing the theory that it was a coincidental ceiling catastrophe and naught to do with their removing roof tiles and failing to secure any cover...)

Friday saw confirmation that, once again, they are moving staff around, shifting people's desks and locations and general disruption. Have yet to have any real explanation as to why. Of course, we all have so much free time that a few more days wasted packing up and relocating is not going to be a problem. \sarcasm.

Anyhoo.

On top of that it's been a crappy week, I've been speaking to Debs around the loss of her mother and it's heartbreaking just on a compassionate level, but of course, it's bringing far too much to the fore about Dad - and as a consequence I'm dreaming horribly (or about my late boss*, which is equally disturbing if not emotionally distressing) On a lighter note though, I did dream that my bathroom taps were possessed by an evil spirit so I attempted an exorcism by singing Amazing Grace at them...

I don't think Sam'n'Dean ought to try that anytime soon (although it would be amusing to watch, perhaps less so than the current eps!)

On the tv front - I'm watching; SPN, this week's episode was good, but emotionally bleak. H5O which was, well, rather ridiculous of course, but enjoyable nonetheless. Ripper Street - similarly ridiculous, but managing to seem believable while I watch and I really like it and I have Suits still to watch. Oh and Lewis! I don't like it in two halves and I don't like where it's going but I'm enjoying the journey, and there was a dramatic moment when Hathaway looked sooo young and vulnerable and oh.

And my tummy hurts still and I've been feeling bleak all week, but I bought myself a new duvet cover and I won £5 on a scratchcard and I'm trying t hold on to the bright side.

*did I mention that walking into work a couple of weeks back I clearly and distinctly heard his voice? There was just me in the corridor and two women in the staff room. Strange. He would have found the concept of haunting the place amusing though, so I'm not perturbed.

The sky keeps rumbling like it has indigestion.

There are neighbours on the corner of the street involved in an altercation. When I arrived home they were standing there in some kind of four way stand off. Then they made peace, then they started shouting, then they threatened to call the police, now they're yelling, then they stop. Someone is now alternating between yelling "F*ck you" and "I love you" and it's horribly unsettling. This is also the house with the person that I had to do an induction for at work, so I'm doubly disconcerted.

I've been feeling rubbish all week, very low - that kind of oppressive mist of melancholy and apathy.

So I've spent all week putting off booking a hair cut - which means when I did book, the only free slot was at 8.45 tomorrow. I hate mornings!

I had other plans for the week, diy plans, or cupboard sorting or... and all I've done is sit under my duvet reading, or sorting things at mother's. We got rid of a spare wardrobe yesterday, and two record players of Dad's - which makes me feel pointlessly guilty.

I watched tv too. H50 was ridiculous, having abandoned any degree of plausibility, but most of it enjoyably so. ( SPN )
Oh and that sitcom,is it Partners? I've deleted the episodes so I can't remember, but the pilot was awful (in a sweet and desperately sad way) and yet I've watched the subsequent two episodes and they've gotten better and it's working and yes. Oh and TBBT, I watched that too, but that's been a bit meh. It sounds as if I've watched loads of telly, but apart from GBBO, that's all I've watched.

I love GBBO, Everything about it (except Brendan), even the close ups of snails. Sainsbury's sell merchandise for the show, and GBBO looks rather uncouth, especially lain against bucolic countryside backgrounds as it is.

We went to Sainsbury's and bought cakes. They were on an offer and so we had three each (for the week not just one day.) Mum bought 3 of the same cake, I went for variety. Consequently Mum had three eclairs to eat, reliable and consistent. I had three different cakes, none of which were in the slightest bit nice.

The neighbours are still shouting.

Let me try and do a post of positivity:

I finally got around to reading the instruction manual for my new sewing machine - and anticipate getting it out of the box today or tomorrow. It still looks magical with regards some of teh things it can do. I want, for instance, to make something covered in buttons, simply because it can sew on buttons and MAKE BUTTONHOLES COMPLETELY BY ITSELF!

I don't know how to make things that require buttonholes however, so I shall focus first on the cable bag I am making that needs a fabric lining. But I have buttonholes in potentia!

***

I'm late to the party, but I saw MIRANDA for the first time Thursday. So funny. Round a friends and I was literally laughing out loud, loudly out loud. I'm about 3 years late to this party - how good is that show?!

***

Other things of funny. The Big Bang Theory - I like it, but normally just pootle along, but Amy's reaction to her gift from Sheldon? I couldn't stop watching it.

***

Other things of fandom:

I made myself watch Supernatural. Not *those* episodes. I can't face that right now, but I picked up at the most recent ep (( I don't know what it's called )

H50 - ( was also on )

What I can remember (because I've watched it several times since it aired) is ( Sherlock )

Today there was a rat. In my bathroom. Well, more precisely from my perspective, there were rat droppings. In my bath. The previous owner of said poop was thankfully well hidden when I began my tentative investigations this morning.

Then I went to work and called in the Daddy cavalry.

I don't want to know the full details of what happened, but I returned to no rat and a somewhat vandalised bathroom.

Process of elimination suggests that rat arrived courtesy of a cat (one of whom, father reports saw said rat when Dad was there and ran away!). This deduction (hope) comes from there being no apparant entrance to the house and the rat bearing bitemark injuries.

Anyhoo. Bathroom is currently under a thick layer of disinfectant and I need a new loo brush and holder and my laundry needed doing promptly.


****

Then I went to work. I passed a grey haired older lady with a stick in the car park. I assumed she was going to Court, but as I let myself in she called to me to hold the door and sheepishly I let her in. She had Probation fobs and cards on but I couldn't see the details on them. She followed me in, then wandered off to an empty office. Policy demands that if you don't recognise someone you should request to see an ID card but I really couldn't face such a confrontation, Instead I went to reception and described the woman and asked who was expected. No one. Receptionist phoned my nice boss and said "Lola's let a murderer with a stick into the building, she's in the office next to you." There was naught but a strangled noise from nice boss as the woman walked past his office to reception.

I've spent the rest of the day being teased by everybody (except her!) about the fact that I didn't recognise our uber uber uber boss and described her as an old lady with a stick.

Thank God I didn't ID her!


****

Today I got 7 new cases. Which takes my caseload to 31 on a half time basis. "Average recommended caseload" is 40-50 on a full time basis. Work is fun.

*****

This week's ( H50 ) That wasn't supposed to be a cohesive review or anything. Just a splurge of words.

****

In other news ( H50 )

Oh H50 - You're back!!!!!


:D

I've had a lot of pain in my hip today - so I had a hot hot bath and then applied a heat pad, donned my comfy pants and spent the day reading, lounging and watching films.

Lots of Hawaii Five-0 fic - I really will get a list together soon. (I've also bought more bizarre - but very cheap - dvds in the name of research...)

I watched last night's ( Supernatural )

I also watched Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - bits in there that I'd forgotten from the cinema viewing. Hot Tub Time Machine - funny. And I could really see Joan Cusack in John at times. Facial expressions etc. Oh and I've just watched ( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0250067/ ) The Trip - one of the dvds I discovered when I had my recent sort out. That was really good too - Larry Sullivan reminded me of Scott Bakula at times, which was a little disconcerting, but I really enjoyed it - although the wigs could have been better!

(I had three unopened TLA/DEFA shrink wrapped films that I was choosing between this evening, couldn't decide so went onto Empire Reviews to see which had the best feedback - and not one of them had been reviewed. Hmm. I used to know a website which reviewed gay themed books/films can't find it now though - any recs?)

I might have rewatched some favourite bits from the most recent Hawaii Five-0 episode too. Yeah yeah, what can I say. I can't help myself. ( apart from the obvious ) bits like that!

I finished Flanders too, having held off doing so, but now it's done and I want to be able to read it for the first time again. Has anyone read Patricia Anthony's other books - they're strongly Sci-Fi from what I can gather. Apparantly she's been unable to get her subsequent books published because they're not sci-fi.

Oh and I rewatched the season end of Doctor Who in preparation for next week.

It's been a very lazy, restful day :)

Ugh. I have to go back to work today after a week off. Most unpleasant - the sooner I win the lottery the better!

It's been a good week off though, there's been laziness, time with friends, much reading, a jaunt with my father and 18 episodes of Hawaii 5-0! And I am very much hooked. It's rather marvellous - Danny is so, he's ranty and beautiful and his clothes are so tight and he gestures so magnificently. He calls Steve 'Babe' and sometimes, which is even better "Steven" and once he showed us his chest, and Steve is also wonderful and has faces and tattoos and is so Ninja SEAL it's ridiculous. Chin rides a motorcycle more beautifully than anyone has ever done before and Kono kicks ass constantly. And has wonderful eye contact and whole conversations without words with Chin and it's all ridiculously marvellous.

I need fic and all the time in the world to read it and instead I'm going back to work.